How They Tried To Destroy Chlex!
by Coconut1214
Summary: A Chlex theme to How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
1. Can't destroy Chlex

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Chlex, or the poem it belongs to Dr. Seuss; I only changed some of the lyrics. The idea belongs to Deb3 at CSI Miami fan fiction because they have the same problem.

A/N: I decided to re-post this with a short continuation, because I'm upset with the way they are writing this season.

**How They Tried To Destroy Chlex.**

Every shipper who watched Smallville liked Chlex a whole lot.

But the Gough and the Miller did not.

The M & the G hated Chlex and the whole third season.

Now please don't ask why, No one quite knows the reason

It could be that their heads weren't screwed on quite right

It could be perhaps the Pink was blocking their sight.

But I think the most likely reason of all

Was they tried not to write any Chlex last fall.

But whatever the reason their heads or the Pink

They sat down at their desks and started to think

They knew every shipper who watched Smallville beneath

Were busy now hanging a mistletoe wreath

They were at their computers frantically feeding their addiction

By writing tons and tons of Chlex fan fiction.

They growled with their fingers nervously drumming

We must find a way to keep Chlex from coming.

They knew that the shippers the boys and the girls both near and far

Would Rush to their TV's, Tivo's and VCR's

And watch again and again the little Chlex scenes

Then they'll point out the littlest things.

And then the forums would light up with discussions to the extreme

Were they'll dissect what little they've seen

Then the shippers young and old would sit down and they'd feast

And they'd feast and they'd feast

Craving every interaction between

Chloe and Lex even in the smallest of scenes

And they do something they liked least of all

Every shipper who watched Smallville the tall and the small

Would come together and they'd start singing

They'd stand hand in hand; their minds would start thinking

Of all the Magnetic chemistry that Chlex had in store

All this singing was making the M & the G sore.

And the more the shippers thought of the Chlex wedding scene

The M and the G were thinking of a way to Delete the whole thing.

Why for 3 seasons, we've put up with this NOW

We must stop Chlex from coming, but HOW

Then the M & the G got an idea

An Awful idea

The M & the G got a wonderful awful idea

"We know just what to do" the M & the G laughed in their throats

"We'll use the Pink to sink the Chlex boat.

And they chuckled and clucked. "What great M & G trick"

"We'll make Lexana and make it stick"

The Chlexer's dreams will be Shattered

But the M & the G did not know that it was chemistry that mattered.

Resurrection is key to help with this season

We'll put Lana in trouble to be the main reason.

She'll come between them because she is our beauty

Not knowing that their idea was a little bit fruity.

Everyone loves the Pink the sun shines out of her ass

But they'll soon find out that Lexana could never pass.

We'll just leave one Chlex scene the in the script

It'll be so tiny nothing could ever come of it.

We'll throw them little crumbs, they smiled with glee

They'll have nothing to do but see the Lexana chemistry

The M & the G were happily humming

They'll find out that no Chlex would be coming

There just tuning in now, we know just what they'll do

Their mouths will hang open a minute or two

Then all the shippers who watch Smallville will all cry BOO-HOO

That's a noise we simply must hear.

They paused and the M & the G put a hand to their ears.

And they heard a sound rising all over the land

It started low, and then it did expand

But this sound wasn't sad. Why, this sound it was glad

The M & the G popped their eyes

Then they shook

What they saw was a shocking surprise!

Every shipper who watched Smallville the tall and the small

Were cheering for Chlex, when there could be none at all.

They hadn't stopped Chlex from coming it came

Somehow or the other, it came just the same

Then the M & the G thought some more

They thought of something they never thought of before

Maybe chemistry does come from the actors

Maybe chemistry is the main factor.

And what happened then? Well, in Smallville they say

The true meaning of chemistry came through to them that day

They figured out that you couldn't make something if it's just not there.

And you can't deny the Kinetic energy flowing through the air.

Finally the M & the G stopped caring about Chloe's youth

Because they finally saw the Truth.

They ended the season with a big bang

They fell under the spell of Chlex and they sang

For the shippers who watch Smallville next season will be top

Were making Chlex go ahead non-stop

We'll give you all the Chlex for you to see

Because no one can hide their undeniable chemistry

And they themselves

Wrote the scene were Chlex sealed their fate with a passionate kiss

Something that all the shippers who watched Smallville would not like to miss!!

Author's Note: The ending is my own wishful thinking.


	2. Evil Chlex

A/N: A continued version for a show that I would actually watch.

And they screwed like bunnies till they were both sore  
  
But the chlexers could be heard screaming "more, more, and more"  
  
Graduation came and went, and a spin off was set  
  
Evil!Chlex was the next demand that would have to be met  
  
So they plotted and planned, planned and plotted  
  
To bring down Superman in the four seasons allotted

**Thanks to Blaire023 over at Naughty-Seduction . net**


End file.
